Conception

after Kelsey Rakes

First her breasts swelled.
Then came the tears, uninvited and always
in public. Then, she dreamed of
boiling milk and a wolf cub
tied up beneath her apartment who howled
and howled. Then the week of no blood.
Then the next and the next.

God had slipped purpose
into her drink and followed her home.
She didn’t dare say the word aloud,       baby         
afraid He would notice how pleased she was,
how she already picked a name.

She let her cat finish that bottle of Merlot.
She took out the garbage.

In her diary, she dragged a fat, dark marker
over the bad thoughts, black slugs
floating to the surface of the page.

That night, she stood naked in the kitchen
summoning every bad word she had ever known
to her mouth. Get it all out now:
fuck, bitch, cunt, shit, you, you, and
then, she went to bed. Happy. Hopeful.

In the morning, her sheets were red.


- Sierra DeMulder

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    GOD DAMN IT SIERRA
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    Holy shit, this. Drudges up all the feels.
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